Let Me Entertain You

"Let Me Entertain You" is the 139th episode of Desperate Housewives.

Summary
Susan's days as a sexy internet sensation may be coming to an end after she angers an important client and incurs the wrath of her boss, Maxine. Meanwhile, Renee and Gabrielle are headed for a smackdown after each of them reveals an intimate secret about the other to the wrong people, and Bree finds herself exhausted by younger lover Keith's sexual stamina. Lynette is angry with Tom after he asks his mother to become the baby's nanny without talking it over with her first, and housewife Emma Graham puts on a cabaret show - with the aid of saxophonist Dave Koz - with surprising results.

Previously on Desperate Housewives
"Bree's affair with her contractor broke new ground. Gaby doted on her biological daughter, Grace. Lynette had too much on her hands. Susan found that keeping her new job a secret... was going to be expensive. But her secret had already been discovered."

- Mary Alice Young


 * Bree offers to have Keith over for dinner. ("The Thing That Counts is What's Inside")
 * Grace is looking through Gaby's jewelry box, noting that she cannot afford pretty things herself. ("The Thing That Counts is What's Inside")
 * Lynette hands a crying Paige to Penny and later tells Tom that they need to get a nanny to help her out. ("The Thing That Counts is What's Inside")
 * Susan is shocked to see a billboard of herself going up. Later, she is discussing the cost of taking it down to maxine and is forced to give up $9000. ("The Thing That Counts is What's Inside")
 * A mystery figure takes Susan's billboard poster from a dumpster and carries it with them. ("The Thing That Counts is What's Inside")

Teaser
"Emma Graham was an ordinary woman, and like most ordinary women, she had an extraordinary dream..."

We see Emma Graham, a housewife, stirring a salad with a faraway look on her face. She is clearly day dreaming.

"She wanted her husband to know she was more than just a wife..."

Emma and her husband are sat on the couch, watching telelvision, and she is staring at him, he makes no eye-contact with her and carries on eating his popcorn.

"She wanted her daughter to know she was more than just a mother..."

Emma is painting a chair in the back yard as her daughter, who is jumping rope, pays no attention to her.

"She wanted her neighbors to know she was more than just the woman who lived next door..."

Gaby, Mrs. McCluskey and Lynette are gossiping as Emma watches from afar, unnoticed, hosing her lawn.

"So Emma made a decision... to turn he dream into reality."

Emma is stirring salad again and brings it over to the dinner table where her husband and daughter are sitting. She bluntly tells her husband that she wants a cabaret show and runs through the equipment she will need, she tells him that he will pay for all of it. The father and daughter look at each other, confused.

"And that is how Emma Graham's friends and neighbors came to gather and the Smokehouse Lounge two weeks later..."

Lynette, Tom and Carlos sit at a table in the Loungue and clap as Emma comes on stage, as do her husband and daughter at another table.

"They would soon learn Emma Graham wasn't so ordinary after all..."

The piano begins playing followed by the rest of the instruments on the stage, and Emma, who is playing the piano, begins to sing, she is amazing and her friends watch happily as she continues through the song. Karen and Lee smile at the song and the music becomes slightly more intense, the daughter smiles at her mother and Emma smiles back as she sings.

"Yes, Emma's dream of sharing her talent had finally come true... Unfortunately, the highlight that ended the evening..."

We hear a scream backstage as a door opens, the saxophone continues to play as Gaby and Renee enter the room, wrestling each other, pushing against one another's arms and crash into a table, they fall to the floor in a brawl.

"...did not come from Emma."

- Mary Alice Young

Renee scremas, "I'm gonna kill you! You whore!" on the floor as she begins to pull Gaby's hair, she roles over so that she is on top and Lee gets up to break up the fight, Gaby and Renee, still fighting, get to there feet and as Lee walks over to them, he gets pushed over and a smash is heard. Renee stares evilly at Gaby and punches her square in the afce, Gaby cradles her nose, very worried about it, and both her and Renee are shocked to discover it is heavily bleeding.

Act I
One Week Earlier

"She knew what she was doing was wrong..."

We see a clothing bag from a store named "Heart's Desire" with a box containing lingerie lying next to it, a woman's hand grabs the lingerie.

"She knew it was very dangerous..."

A pair of black high-heels are on the bed and the same woman grabs them from their place.

"She knew the risks if people found out..."

The woman slips a slutty, black stocking up her leg.

"But Susan Delfino was determined to get back to Wisteria Lane..."

Susan, the woman, walks up to the mirror and looks at herself in her skimpy outfit and does so shamefully.

"''And that is how her world began to fall apart."

- Mary Alice Young

Susan opens a laptop with a webcam on it and introduces herself to the person on the other end of the monitor. "Hi, I'm Tanya," she lies, "Thank you for chosing me, I'm all yours for the next hour. How about we start by getting to know each other a little better?" says Susan, in a dignified way, "Show me your jugs." says the guy on the screen, Susan laughs him off and tries to change the subject by spotting some dirt under the coffee table and offers to sexily vacuum. The guy agrees, but only after she takes her top off and shakes her breats for him. Susan halts him, noting that they still have 59 more minutes together, "And isn't it sexier to warm each other up with some naughty talk first?" she says slowly and seductively, moving closer to the monitor. "I have to listen to my old lady bla bla bla all day long, so lose the top and show me those money makers." he tells her, Susan asks him if he's reading from some sort of boob thesaurus before asking him if there's some romanitc fantasy he'd like to share with her. "Okay," he says, "Are you lactating?". Susan is shocked and slams the laptop shut, calling him a pig.

Over at Maxine's place, Maxine is yelling at Susan, telling her that you never pull the plug in the middle of a session. Susan points out that the guy was a total perv who clearly had severe mother issues. She pulls her lingerie up. Maxine, angrily, tells Susan that she's just lost them an amjor client and should the guy begin talking about it at work, they could lose the hole city council. Susan sighs and sits down, apologizing, saying that she lost her nerve, "I can't keep giving you chances like this." Maxine tells Susan before going to answer a ringing phone. She talks, "Va-Va-Va-Broom... oh, you want a private session with Tanya, sorry, that isn't gonna happen, she doesn't work for me anymore." Maxine says as she looks at Susan. Susan seems shocked and ashamed.

Down on Wisteria Lane, Bree and Keith are walking along the footpath after a date and Bree apologizes for picking such a formal restaurant and will choose a place with fewer forks the next time. he thanks her again for helping him out with that. He tells her that he had a lot of fun and then kisses her goodnight on the cheek. Bree seems less-than-satisfied. He begins to walk away but she stops him with, "keith, did you really have alot of fun." He confirms that he did but wonders why she would ask, "Well, because it's our third date and you just kissed me like you're saying goodbye to your aunt." she tells him. He tells her that he is trying to treat her like a lady, she notes that that's sweet, "Now knock it off." she embraces him in a kiss, passionately.

"Three times?!" Susan says shocked over on Gaby's porch, "In one night." Bree says, referencing her coital activities with Keith the night prior. Lynette notes that three times was her entire September. Gaby emerges from her house and tells the girls that she just had the nicest chat with Grace, "She said the sweetest thing-" she is cut off. "Bree had sex with keith three times last night." Susan tells her, "Oh, screw my story, tell me everything." Gaby says before sitting down to join them, Bree sits up and tells them that the sex was amazing and compares it to an opera. Gaby thinks this means that Bree fell asleep during it but Bree goes on to say that making love to a man in his thirties makes everything better and provides examples, Susan stops her syaing that they've heard enough. Susan then points out that Renee is back from New York and the girls turn to see Renee walking up the lane towards where they are, Gaby seems annoyed that Lynette invited her and Lynette asks whether or not Gaby likes Renee, Gaby says that Renee is kind of a self-obsorved, narsacistic diva. "Good point, we already have one of those." Lynette says to Gaby who retaliates with a small, playful smack. Renee walks up the porch holding champagne, "Drop the drug store champagne, ladies, and get ready for the real stuff, because we are celebrating!" she pops the cork off and Susan asks what the occasion is, Renee says that it is her divorce settlement, as it was a lot of money for her. Gaby says that she thought there was a pre-nup but Renee notes that no pre-nup is a match for her legal team. Renee pours the champagne into the ladies glasses, "That was iced-tea." Bree tells her, "Well, I just made it fun." says Renee, she goes on to tell the women that she'll have them all over for dinner in the evening, she has two more cases of champagne, a truck-load of caviar and a pile of money to role around, naked in. She laughs and asks what their responses are, Gaby downs the last of her glass, "If there's more of this I am definately there." she tells her, Renee asks Bree who says she has a date and needs to carbo-load before she bites into a sandwich, Lynette declines too, saying that she has a new nanny, Susan also cannot attend. "Well, I guess it's just you and me, Gabs and Nee." Renee tells Gaby, Lynette notes how they were just talking about the large amoubt Renee and Gaby have in common, "Weren't we Gabs?"

Over at 4355 Wisteria Lane, Lynette is showing one of her nanny interviewees out, the potential nanny tells Lynette that her baby is really cute and Lynette tells her that she'll let her know before she walks out of the door and Lynette closes it behind her. Tom emerges from the stairs and asks Lynette if she has had any luck in finding a nanny, she says she hasn't, "I've interviewed eight girls, they're all either too inexperienced or too expensive." she tells him. "What about the one with the boobs?" Tom asks, Lynette tells him that that's why they're not hiring her. "Well, don't give up yet, because I found us one more applicant." he says, Lynette seems proud of him and he asks her why she is so surprised, "The Christmas lights are still up from last year." she tells him, there is a knock at the door. Tom notes that she is early and Lynette is anxious to know who it is, Tom notes that she always used to hate yams but then she gave them a second chance and realized that she liked them, "Well, sometimes, Lynette, people are like yams." he tells her. Lynette's smiles immediately falls to a frown, "What did you do?" she asks before going over to the door to answer it. She peeks out the window and is shcoked at what she sees, she turns back to Tom and asks him if he's insane, Tom tells her that he was talking to her last night and mentioned they needed help, causing her to volunteer. There is another knock at the door and Lynette tells Tom to get it before moving behind him, leaving him to go answer the door. He opens it to Allison Scavo who drops her bag saying, "Tommy!" he yells, "Mom!" in reciprocation and the two hug. Lynette sees this, "Why couldn't she have been a yam?"

Act II
Over at Renee's place, Gaby grabs another bottle of champagne from the coffee table and pours some into her and Renee's glasses on the couch, she asks if Tina was the first girl Doug cheated on Renee with and Renee says that she doesn't know, "You hear stories," she says, "There was this thing during the all-stars game, pictures of Doug in the tabloids with a... cocktail waitress." Gaby seems shocked at this but Renee regards that afterwards he gave her an expensive bracelet so she forgot about it. Gaby notes that it must be a nightmare to be married to a pro-athlete and congratulates Renee on getting rid of him, they clink glasses. "You know, I feel like you get me, Gaby," Renee says, "And do you know why? Because.. we're both extremely beautiful." Gaby looks at Renee, "God bless you for having the courage to say that." she tells her. Renee notes that only someone who looks like them can understand what a burden it can be. "Actually it's pretty awesome." Gaby says and the both of them laugh. "You know, sometimes I drive fast on purpose just to see if I can flirt my way out of a ticket." Renee admits, "Ammeteur hour, I once got a bank manager to shave a point off our morgage by bending over to pick up a pencil." Gaby tells her. "To this day Carlos calls it my million dollar ass." They both laugh and Renee says that she can top that, "Yesterday, these babies, earned me a cold eight million." Gaby asks her what she means and Renee admits that after her settlement meeting, she slept with Doug's lawyer. Gaby playfully calls her awful and Renee says she knows, and that she shouldn't have said that, she asks Gaby to keep it to herself and Gaby agrees to. "I don't know you well enough, you gotta give me some dirt on you." she says. Gaby is taken aback and takes a lot of time to think of what to say, she evntually tells Renee that she can't think of anything and sips her champagne. "Really?" Renee asks, "Nothing? Not even, say... plastic surgery?" Gaby is shocked at this and gets up to her feet, telling Renee that she has never had any work done on her body. Renee says that perhaps not the body but the nose, definitely. "How dare you? I am... insulted." Gaby says. Renee satres at her and Gaby comes out with, "Okay, fine, I was nineteen, it was just a little bump." she sits back down. Renee tells her that that's what they all say and Gaby tells her to not tell anyone because if the girls were to find out she would never hear the end of it. "Of course you can trust me, I'm beautiful." Renee tells her, Gaby notes that that's true and they again, clink their champagne glasses.

Over in Lynette's kitchen, Tom walks in and says good morning to his wife and mother, who is cooking breakfast for the family. His mom reciprocates but when he goes to kiss Lynette, she tells him that she still isn't speaking to him. "Your breakfast will be ready in a minute." Allison says, Tom sits down and taps his mug, Allison cheerfully takes it to makes him some coffee. She pours it into his mug and tells him that his scrambled eggs are ready, he tells her that he was hoping for her French toast. "She made you eggs, Tom, eat them." Lynette tells him. "No, it's no problem, you just read your morning paper and I'll fix it right up, Rodney." Allison tells him, "Tommy, mom." he corrects her, Allison says it's just because he looks so much like his father. Lynette hears Paige crying and wonders what it could be now, Allison tells her that she will get it as that's what she's there for. She leaves the room to tend to Paige. Tom sees happy and tells Lynette that her mother is on top of it so she can just sit and have coffee. "Look, I can take your mother in small doses but her living hear every day." Lynette tells him as she sits down next to him, Tom argues that he never understodd what Lynette has against his mom and asks her what her beef is. Lynette tells Tom that she cannot stand the person he becomes when around his mother as he becomes this neanderthol while she is bending over her apron strings to serve him.Tom wonders what the big deal is and Allison walks back into the room, Paige having been taken care of. Tom taps his mug again and Allison goes to get him some more coffee. "Just know that if you ever hold your coffee cup up to me you will be tapping it with a stump." Lynette says before leaving.

Mike is signing something over at the bank and Lee walks in behind him, he sees that Mike is there and addresses him, walking closer to converse with him. "I was gonna call you," Lee says, "I was taling with Paul Young, he and the new Mrs. are really enjoying the house." Mike doesn't seem to care much, Lee carries on, "And Paul was wondering if you would be interested in selling the place." This catches Mike's attention, "He's willing to make a very generous offer." Lee tells him. "Lee, I never kicked your ass for renting our house to that guy because you didn't know our history, but now you do, so I gotta wonder, are you an idiot?" Mike asks him. Lee apologizes, saying that Paul wanted him to ask, and Mike tells Lee that he and Susan are working really hard to get the place back so Lee should tell Paul that as soon as his liese is up, they're moving back in. Mike grabs his papers and leaves.

Over at 4353 Wisteria Lane, Paul is in his kitchen and answers the phone, Lee is on the other line, telling Paul that he just ran into Mike, Paul asks if Lee asked Mike about the offer, Lee says that he wasn't interested. Paul asks if he told Mike how much he was willing to pay, "I could've but I didn't wanna get punched." Lee tells him. "You disappoint me, Lee." Paul says, Lee tells him that there are other houses but Paul says that he needs 4353, he also states that he has another way to get it...

Back at the bank, Mike hands in his deposit and the banker shows him what his balance will be by Monday, he reads it and knows that something is up, telling the banker that they should have a lot more money in there.

Susan is sitting at the table in her apartment holding a fancy bracelet whilst on the phone, she is wondering how much the bracelt, that belonged to her grandmother, would cost. She doesn't seem to happy with the answer but tells the person that she'll be round tomorrow. Susan sadly hangs up the phone. Lynette knocks on Susan's window and waves, Susan greets her and goes over to the door to let her in. Lynette gives Susan back her gold necklace that she had borrowed and Lynette asks what Susan needs it for. Susan says that she simply needed it back, Lynette asks her if she is okay, noticing the sadness in her face and voice. Susan nods. "You wanna talk about something?" Lynette asks. Susan says that she can't and then begins to cry, Lynette tries to comfort her friend and goes to find her a tissue. Lynette goes into the bedroom and Mike suddenly walks through the front door, urgently telling Susan that he was just at the bank and they're missing $9000. Lynette peeks out the bedroom door, hearing the argument and Mike asks Susan if she took any money out. She says she did, "Susan?" Mike asks, "Susan, what happened to that money?" he asks again. "She lent it to me." says Lynette, emerging from the other room. "We had some bills from Paige's birth that weren't covered by insurance and Susan, very kindly, offered to help us out." Lynette explains to Mike. Mike looks at Susan in shock, "That's right." Susan says, "And she's going to pay it back by Friday." Lynette adds, "With interest." but Susan gestures for this not to be, "Or not," Lynette says, "Because we're friends and why would you charge us interest?" Mike looks back at Susan and tells her that he has to get back to work - "In case any other of our friends need money." he says before walking out the door. "Thank you so much." Susan says, hugging Lynette who tells her that she is welcome. They pull out of the hug, "Anything you want to tell me?" Lynette asks her teary-eyed friend. "Yeah," Susan says, "But promise you won't yell?".

"You did porn on the internet?!" Lynette yells after having the situation explained to her, Susan exclaims that it was just cleaning in lingerie and she was never naked. "Well, unless the guys were watching for cleaning tips, it's porn! Susan, how could you do this?!" Lynette yells, disgusted. Susan yells that she feels bad enough about it already and Lynette tells her that she should, wondering what would happen if Mike or her kids found out. "You know, it is really easy for you to come down here from your five-bedroom house in the suburbs and criticize me! I am not on Wisteria Lane anymore! Look at what Mike and I are trying to climb out of! We can't even afford hot lunches for MJ at school, so think about that next time you wanna judge me!" Susan yells. She walks past Lynette who slowly turns to her friend, she holds her arms comfortingly and tells her that she is done judging and is back to being her friend. "I'm sorry you had to do that." Lynette says and Susan holds back a cry. "Me too."

Act III
At nighttime, there is a knock on Renee's door and she goes to answer it, she sees Doug standing there with flowers and she asks him what he is doing there. He tells her that he had to see her, "Well, I'd invite you in but it's late and I hate you." she tells him. "Baby, I flew all this way, at least hear me out." he asks of her, Renee allows him in but tells him that if it's about the settlement, he's wasting his breath. "I miss you." he tells her, she asks how Tina feels about that but he tells her that that was a stupid mistake and it's over."I know I screwed up," he says, "Big, this time. Give me another chance." Renee walks past him into the lving room, apologizing to him but telling him that she's actually happy where she is. "I'm getting a fresh start, making new friends." she tells him. Doug advances towards her, telling her that she cannot be happy because she was made for Manhattan. He then pulls something out of his pocket and shows her a very expensive ring. "Oh, Doug, don't do this to me." she tells him, he asks her to think of all that they had - "I want it back, don't you?" he asks her. Renee pauses.

The door to 4354 Wisteria Lane opens and Bree and Keith enter the former's home after a date. Bree tells Keith that she cannot stop thinking about the play that they just witnessed and asks him what he thought the angel represented when he flew down in the middle of the night. "I don't know, I was too busy looking for the wires." he tells her. Bree pasues but then smiles at him, he reciprocates. "So, are you in the mood for some dessert?" she asks him, he replies with, "Totally" and Bree walsk off into the kitchen, voicing that she believes the angel represented hope or a second chance at redemption. She pulls a bowl of strawberries and some whipped cream out of the refrigerator and puts the items to one side. As she continues saying what she is saying she turns to a naked Keith standing at the kitchen door, she stops talking. She stares at him and lets out an, "Oh my." Keith tells her, "When you said 'dessert' I just assumed..." and Bree tells him that there's no two ways to interpret that. She smiles.

Bree falls down onto her kitchen table after having sex with Keith on it and she tells him that that was incredible. She asks him where he learned to do that and he simply tells her that she inspires him as he goes down to kiss her.

Bree is lying, moaning in pleasure, on teh stairs, telling Keith that she was just going to let him walk behind her on the stairs and he assumably ended up having sex with her. He goes to kiss her neck and Bree suddenly looks shocked, "What is that?!" she asks, Keith tells her that inspiration has struck again.

Bree is in the shower, washing, and Keith suddenly opens the shower door, naked, he greets her and Bree begs him to tell her that he's there to stab her. He wonders what she's talking about, "Nothing," she replies, "Come on in." Bree turns around, looking worried, as Keith joins her in the shower.

Bree's living room door burst open and she emerges from it, carrying a tray of food, and walking whilst crounching and seeming in pain. She slowly sits down and puts the tray on the coffee table in front of Gaby and Lynette. Lynette says that the vegetables should be sliced, noting that they're all in their raw form, but Bree tells her that she's too tired to prepare food properly. Lynette picks up a zukini and Bree asks her to please get it away from her. Gaby says, "I guess someone was with Keith last night." Lynette goes on to jokingly ask, "Were you once, twice, three times not a lady?" Bree tells her that it's not funny as she and Keith had sex for six hours and she feels like the Holland Tunnel. Gaby asks her why she doesn't just tell him that she needs a little break. "Because, he's young," Bree answers, "If I turn down a roll in the hey, he's gonna think I'm an old woman." Lynette tells her, "You just said 'roll in the hey', I think that ship has sailed." There is a knock at the door and Bree gets up and limps to the door, noting that she needs to find a way to slow keithd own before her limp becomes permanent. Bree answers the door to Renee who is greeted by the other ladies and goes to sit down as Bree closes the door behind her. Gaby tells Renee that she is just in time as she mixed up a signature drink in honor of her divorce from Doug, referenceing the glass and jug in her hand. "I wouldn't pour that just yet." Renee tells her, "I'm starting to rethink this whole divorce thing." She tells them that Doug showed up last night and told her that he wants her back, "And he gave me this!" Renee states, flashing the sapphire ring on her finger to the ladies. She tells them, as she sits down, that Doug screws up a lot but his apologies are always the 4th July. Lynette makes it apparent that she never gets such good apologies from Tom. "But he cheated on you?!" Gaby states, loudly, to Renee. Renee acknowledges that but does the same for the fact that he has women throwing themselves at him in every city and meanwhile they had ten great years together where he loved her and cared for her and she believes she should give him a second chance. "Am I crazy?" Renee asks, "Well you have invested ten years in the marriage." Bree says, "No one goes that long without a few bumps in the road." Lynette weighs in. "Okay, I'm doin' it." Renee says, "Are you insane?!" Gaby yells, the women's attentions are turned towards her, Gaby yells that Doug dumped her for another woman but Renee tells her that he apologized and she foragve him. "Why?! Because he gave you a stupid ring?! He's buying you off again! Open your eyes!" Gaby yells. "Hey!" Renee retaliates, "It's my marriage anyway. Why don't you just keep your fake nose out of it?" Gaby is completely taken aback and Bree and Lynette suddenly turn to her, staring at her nose, Gaby begins to feel self-conscious. "What did she mean, 'fake'?" Lynette asks. "Gabrielle Solis, did you have a nose job?" Bree asks secondly. "Hello! We're talking about Trampy McTrinket!" Gaby yells, pointing at Renee, trying to shift the attention off of herself. "After all of these years of you bragging about your natural beauty?!" Bree aks, Gaby tells her that she never bragged but Lynette reminds her that she once called her own face proof of God's existence and Bree reminds her of the time that she called her fraud for wearing a padded swimsuit. "And now we find out that you've had plastic surgery? Ooh. That changes everything." Lynette says, gleefully, and Bree agrees. After Gaby has a failed attempt at trying to defend herself, she turns to Renee and tells her that she will regret what she said. Gaby gets up and leaves, "Oh, come on, Gaby, we're kidding, don't get your nose out of joint!" Lynette calls after her. Gaby briefly walks into the house, gasps, and slams the door as she leaves. Lynette and Bree share a high-five.

Act IV
"Bree Van de Kamp had a problem. Her boyfriend's sexual appetite was proving to be exhausting. And then, out of the blue, Bree came up with a solution."

Bree is asleep at her table, exhausted after a night of sex with Keith. Bree then, suddenly, springs up, awake.

"Since Keith's demands were overwhelming her..."

Bree begins to draw up a list of chores.

"Why not make a few overwhelming demands of her own?"

- Mary Alice Young

Later, in the kitchen, Bree hands the pages she drew up to Keith who looks through them, he tells her that there's a lot of work there and he thinks he can get it doen by Friday. Bree tells him that she will need it sooner than that, "Definately by tonight." she tells him. Keith looks shocked and she walks away from him, smiling.

Tom walks through the door and Lynette walks up to him telling him that his mother baked him his favorite cookies for his trip. "Macaroon?" Tom asks, but Lynette tells him that it's oatmeal raisin. He tells her that they're his dad's favorites and Lynette suggests that he could trade them with the other boy next to him on the plane for his snack. "Make fun. But you have to admit, she's been great with baby." he tells her. Lynette admits that she has and tells Tom that he was right and she was wrong. Tom notes that if only his cookies her macaroons then it would be the best day of his life. Lynette kisses him and tells him to call her when he lands. Tom walks out the door and over to the table where Porter, Preston, Parker and Penny are all sitting and she asks Allison if she can help with the lasagne. Allison tells Lynette that the kids wanted meatloaf so she changed the menu and she tells her to sit, Lynette does so. Allison dishes up the mashed potatoes onto everyone's plate and tells Lynette that Tom was telling her that she wanted to go back to work. "I must say, I don't understand that." Allison says. "Well, that's... okay." Lynetet tells her. Porter taps his glass and Allison immediately rushes off to fetch milk. Lynette asks him what he's doing and he tells her that he's out of milk, "Well, your grandmother is not here to serve you." Lynette tells him, "I don't mid, dear." Allison says, before pouring Porter a glass of milk. Parker asks if Allison could fill his glass too and Preston raises his own soon after. "Boys?!" Lynette tells them. "Penny, I have to get the meat, so yuo get the sodas." she tells her. Penny wonders why and Allison tells her that they have to take care of their men. Penny gets up but Lynette tells her to sit and she does. "You boys want a drink, get up and get it." Lynette tells her sons. Allison tries to tell lynette that the boys have had a very long day with their classes and after-school sports. "Allison, in this house, the women don't wait on the men, the men get off their asses and help themselves." Lynette says. "When did it become a sin to take care of your family?" Allison asks. "You modern women, you just plop out a baby and then you can't wait to get back to your silly careers." Allison adds that she took care of her boys and when her husband came home, there was always a hot meal waiting for him on the table. "Yeah, and how did that work out for you? He had an affair and left." Lynette reminds her. The kids all stare at their mother who realizes that she said an awful thing, she then looks at Allison who looks very insulted, Allison then walks off and after a pause, Lynette says, "Damn." and continues to eat.

Bree is sitting up in bed, alone, reading a book when Keith enters the bedroom, "I didn't realize you were still here, have you been working this whole time?" she asks him, he says that she told him to get it all done in the day and tells her, that if he has nothing else to do, he would like to go home and slip into a coma. Bree offers to let him stay as she'd hate to see him out there driving when he is so exhausted. "You are exhausted, right?" she asks, hoping that he is. He confirms it, saying that every part of his body hurts. "Then stay, sleep here." she says, gesturing the empty side of the bed next to her. He turns on the lamp and sits on the bed as Bree tells him that in the morning she will make him some Belgian waffles as a special thank you for all of his hard work. Bree turns off her lamp and the room is dark, she rolls over to go to sleep and Keith begins to spoon her, Bree's eyes suddenyl open. "Uh, what are you doing?" she asks him, "I thught of another way you could thank me." he tells her. "You said every part of your body was sore?!" she reminds him, "One part's feeling okay." he tells her. Bree turns on the lamp and gets up, telling him that she's had enough. He wonders what she is talking about and she tells him that she is older than him and that she doesn't have the stamina for him and his Woody Woodpecker sex-drive. Keith gets up too, "You can't kee up?!" he yells, as he mentions that he's dating a woman that is much too cultured for him as she talks to waiters in French and talks about the meaning of plays. "You're ten times smarter than me! That's why I keep sexing you up! To keep you interested!" he explains to her. Bree stares at Keith and he turns around and sits on the bed, "Make no mistake, I am interested." she tells him, "I love that when I'm praddling on about the meaning of the angel, you look for the wires." she tells him that he has his own way of seeing the world and it's fun and down-to-Earth and everything she isn't. She comforts him and then sits down on the bed beside him. "So, you're saying you like me how I am?" Keith asks, saying that he hadn't thought of that. Bree says, "Yes, very much." as she puts her arms around his neck and kisses him, she then stares down at his crotch, "Now put that thing away and let's rest." They smile at each other.

Act V
A brunette woman is sitting on the sofa in the Scavo house feeding Paige. Tom walks through the door and wonders who she is, she introduces herself as Jenny, the new nanny. Lynette walks down the stairs, "Yeah, isn't it great?! I offered her a little more money and she took the job." she says as she joins her husband. "She's the one with the boobs? Remember?" Lynette asks Tom out of Jenny's earshot, he says he does and Lynette tells him he's welcome. Tom asks if he can talk to Lynette upstairs for a minute and she agrees, she begins walking upstairs but Tom remains where he is, Lynetet stops, "I'll be up in a minute." he tells her, Lynette dismisses this and goes off upstairs.

Lynette is sitting on her bed and Tom walks into the room, he informs Lynette that he just fired Jenny. "What?! You had no right to do that!" Lynette yells at him, Tom tells her, "And you had no right to make my mother feel unwelcome in my house!" Tom tells her that she just wanted to be a part of the family. Lynette excalims that if they were living in 1955 she would be very on board with his mother's parenting skills, "But I will not let her raise our children to turn out like-!" Lynette stops in her tracks and Tom asks her to finish the sentence, "To turn out like me?" he asks, "No!" Lynette yells, she tells Tom that when they met, he thought that there were only two roles for women, making a cake or jumping out of one. "I'm sorry, I just don't want her here!" she says. Tom yells that throughout their entire marriage, Lynette has always been the one to make the decisions, but on this one, he's putting his foot down and telling her that his mother is staying.

A school bell is heard ringing and we are suddenly taken to Susan teaching her class, she tells them to gather up their supplies as it's the end of the day and she'll see them tomorrow, as they begin to do so, Susan hears her cell phone ring and goes to answer it, Maxine is on the other line and Susan tells her that she cannot talk now as she's at work, Maxine says that, despite the fact that she fired her, she's willing to give her another chance. Susan wonders why. "Well, this guy keeps calling, he really wants a private session with you and he's starting to offer some serious money." Maxine asks for Susan's answer and Susan ponders the offer, "How serious are we talking?" she asks.

Over at the lounge that Emma Graham's cabaret show should be taking place, Gaby is sitting at the bar and Emma thanks her for coming to the show. "Yeah, yeah, are you going to be singing any songs about a woman who's a back stabbing bitch?" Gaby asks. Carlos hears this and comes up behind Gaby, telling Emma that they are really looking forward to it and wishing her luck. Emma thanks him and leaves. "Would you get over it already, why don't we go and sit down with our friends?" he asks her, "No!" Gaby yells, saying that her friends keep making fun of her and she's sick of their jokes. Carlos assures her that they are merely teasing her but she informs him that it's not funny. "My thing was my natural beauty. Like, Susan's an artist. Lynette's a great businesswoman. Bree's the perfect home maker. I was the beautiful one, now I'm just the plastic one." Gaby and Carlos see Renee enter the lounge on Doug's arm. "And there's the woman who's to blame. Man, I'd like to smack that smile right off her face, which, by the way, has been pulled so tight, it'd probably smack me back." Gaby points out.

"I forgot what it was like walking into a room on your arm." Renee says to Doug on the other side of the room, "I like it." she says, "Baby, I think you are the oen they are staring at." he tells her, she twirls round to face him and points out to him that the ring helps with that. They kiss.

Over at the bar, Gaby downs a martini in one go and Mrs. McCluskey and Lee make their way over to her. Karen says that she didn't know Gaby would be there. "I don't know what you heard but it's all crap." Gaby says immediately, "Don't lie," says Lee, "That'll make it grow again." He and Karen burst out laughing and walk away from Gabrielle, leaving her angry. The bar tender hands an ice bucket with champagne to a waitress next to Gaby, he tells the waitress to tell Doug that it's on the house. Gaby grabs the ice bucket and says that she'll do it, the waitress walks away and Gaby makes her way through the guests, clutching the champagne bucket in her arms. She srops the bucket on Doug and Renee's table, "It's on the house." she says, "Oh, by the way, she slept with your lawyer. Enjoy the show." Gaby walks away and Doug looks at Renee, "Is that true?" he asks her, "Well," she replies, "The thing about that is-" Doug gets up and leaves just as they announce Emma Graham to the stage. The audience claps as she makes her way onto the platform, smiling.

Renee angrily stands up and grabs a cheering Gaby, "A word?!" she says, she drags her to the back room by the arm and Gaby tells her to get her paws off the Versachi. "Why did you tell him that?!" Renee asks, "Well, you know me and my big nose!" Gaby replies. "This is my marriage we're talking about! This tromps your stupid nose!" Renee yells, "Oh, whatever, thy're both fake!" Gaby retaliates, "What do you know?" Renee asks, "You're nothing but a boring housewife!" Gaby tells her to shut up but Renee continues, "Whose life is so pathetic, you gotta crap all over mine!" Gaby is insulted, "I'm pathetic?!" she yells, "Hey, what do you call a girl who sleeps with a guy for eight million dollars?!" Renee is extremely shocked and angry.

Out in the lounge, Emma is singing on stage and Gaby's cream is heard from backstage, her and Renee tumble out of the room they were in and into the one full of the audience members and Renee and Gaby continue to wrestle, brawling on the floor. Renee yells, "I'm gonna kill you! You whore!" as they roll over and Renee becomes on top in the fight, "Get of me!" Gaby yells, pushing against Renee. Lee stands up and tries to get them to break it up but the girls are now standing up and Renee pushes Gaby and she knocks Lee right over, causing him to fly backwards. Renee lets go of Gaby, "I will never forgive you for this!" she yells, "Sure you will," Gaby says, "I'll just buy you a sapphire ring." Renee says, "Oh, you like my ring, get ready to smell it?!" Gaby tries to walk away but Renee pulls her arm, forcing her to turn herself to face her, Renee then punches Gaby in the face and the whole audience gasps with shock. In the next moment, Gaby is hysterical, cradling her nose which is now bleeding and becoming very worried.

Act VI
Renee is sipping coffee over at her house in her living room when, suddenly, the phone rings. She answers it and tells Doug, who is on the other line, that she didn't think she would be hearing from him again. "Look, I've been thinking about everything that happened, I slept with someone, you slept with someone. Maybe we should just call it even." Doug suggests. Renee is surprised at this and Doug tells her that it is what they both want. "Right?" he asks, Renee is silent.

Tom's mother is sitting at the kitchen table and Lynette walks into the room, for a second, they stare at each other but do not say anything and Lynette walks on to go get some coffee. She sits next to Allison and pours her a mug. Allison thanks her, "I am so sorry for saying those things about your husband." Lynette says, "I appreciate that," Allison says, "I'm sorry if I crossed some sort of line. It just felt so nice to feel useful again." Lynette tells her that she is useful and that she needs her around, especially when she goes back to work. Allison goes on to say that the kitchen is her favorite room in the house because the family sits together there and she gets to cook for them and make them happy and she just doesn't understand why Lynette would want to go out there and give that up just to work. Lynette tears up and she says, "It's just who I am." Penny enters the room and tells Lynette that Paige is crying, Lynette says that she's probably hungry and so gets up, kisses Allison on the cheek and leaves to tend to the youngest Scavo. Penny grabs a cookie and begins to eat it, "I'm so sorry, what's your name again?" Allison asks, "I'm Penny." Penny beams, "And, do you live here?" Allison asks. Penny seems very confused.

Gaby and Renee are both walking towards each other from opposite ends of the lane. Each are carrying gifts for the other as a means of apology and they greet each other. "I'm not really used to apologizing." Gaby says, a band aid on her nose. "But here's some chocolates." Gaby hands her gift over to Renee, who says, "I haven't touched a carb since 1985 but thank you. Believe it or not, I was actually on my way to apologize to you. I don't know what came over me." Renee hands Gaby the bouquet of flowers in her arms. Gaby explains that she still doesn't think Doug deserves her but she was wrong to screw with her marriage. Renee informs Gabrielle that Doug called that morning and wants her back. "Oh, wow!" Gaby says, unconvincingly, "And I said 'no'." Renee tells her. "Seriosuly?" Gaby asks, "He said we could pretend it never happened and I thought of all the things I pretended never happened over the years. You were right, Gaby, I needed to open my eyes." Renee explains. Gaby asks Renee if she is sure this is what she wants and Renee confirms it and thanks Gaby for being the only one of the other women to have the guts to tell her the truth. "You're a real friend and I'll take that over a sapphire ring any day." Renee says. The girls smile and hug, and when they pull away, Gaby asks, "You're keeping the ring, right?" Renee replies with, "Oh, hell yeah." The two girls walk off together.

Over at her apartment, Susan is pacing back and forth in fornt of her laptop screen, soon, she derobes herself to reveal the skimpy, red lingerie underneath and she sits down in front of the webcam. She types in her pass code but all she sees on the other side of the camera is an empty room. "Hello?" she asks, leaning over the screen, "Is anyone there?" she asks, leaning in closer, a hand waves on the other side of the screen and Susan greets him, asking him if he, too, is shy. "Well, that's okay, so am I." she tells him. "Why don't you start with just telling me your name?" she asks, "I think you know my name." says Paul Young who is sitting down in Susan's screen, Susan is shocked and immediately lowers the laptop screen, yelling out in shock and sitting down for the same reason. "I'm still here, Susan." says Paul's voice from that closed laptop, Susan takes time to catch her breath and takes her robe, she then uses it to cover herself and slowly, caitiously, lifts the screen back up to see Paul again. "I'm glad you put your robe on. I hate to see you debasing yourself." he tells her. "What do you want?" she asks him, "I'd like your house," he says, "And I'm willing to pay a very fair price for it." Susan tells Paul that Mike told her about that but it's not for sale. "Susan, it seem to me that alot of things are for sale, your body, your honor, your reputation. The house will seem to be the smallest of those things." Susan, tears in her eys, asks Paul if he is threatening her. "I'm just saying that it would be terribly unfortunate if anyone were to find out what I already know. I mean, I was shocked, I could only imagine what your husband and son would think." he tells her. "You son of a bitch." she says, he says that he knows it's a lot to take in so tells her that he'll allow her a couple of days to think about it. "I'd hate for you to feel I was pressuring you." he says. He reaches for his own webcam and Susan's screen goes blank.

"He knew what he was doing was wrong..."

Paul closes his laptop and places a hand on the billboard poster of Susan for Va-Va-Va-Broom.com on his right.

"He knew it was very dangerous..."

We see Paul walking through his house and to the front door.

"He knew the risks if people found out..."

We see Paul walking down the steps of his porch and across his lawn.

"But Paul Young wanted to punish those who had betrayed him..."

Paul walks across his lawn and looks out on Wisteria Lane, his plan set in motion. He looks from one side of the street to the other, determined. Paul lets out a very large grin.

"So he had a plan that would set neighbor against neighbor, friend against friend. And it was a plan that was going to succeed."

- Mary Alice Young

Production
"Let Me Entertain You" was written by Sara Parriott and Josann McGibbon. It marks the first appearances of Reggie Austin as Doug Perry and Lois Smith as Allison Scavo. American pop singer, Dana Glover, also makes a guest appearance as Emma Graham in the opening scenes.

Reception
On its original broadcast on ABC, the episode scored 12.159 million of viewers and achieved a 3.9 rating in the adults 18-49 demographic. With the DVR Rating, this episode is up 1.7 in million of viewers (rising to a total of 13.9 million of viewers) and it's up 0.8 in the adults 18-49 demographic (rising to a total of a 4.7 rating). "Let Me Entertain You" received positive reviews from television critics and fans of the series.

Trivia

 * Tuc Watkins (Bob Hunter) and Mason Vale Cotton (M.J. Delfino) do not appear and are not credited.
 * Madison De La Garza (Juanita Solis) do not appear and is credited. It's the first time this season somebody is credited and don't appear.
 * This is Reggie Austin (Doug Perry), Lois Smith (Allison Scavo) and Dana Glover (Emma Graham) first episode.
 * Episode takes it's title from the song of the same name from Stephen Sondheim's "Gypsy."
 * "Start All Over Again" by Dana Glover feat.﻿ Dave Koz is sung by Emma Graham during the episode's opening scenes.
 * When Keith is sitting on the bed talking to Bree about trying to keep her interested in the relationship, you can see he has a tattoo across his heart that says "Megan". Green married actress Megan Fox recently.

Bloopers and continuity errors

 * During the original airing of the episode, when Gabby and Renee are apologizing to each other, you can see in the background, inside Renee's house, through the window, the shadow of a man but only for a brief second.

Gallery
Gallery of photographic stills released to promote the episode.

Let Me Entertain You